David Maddox: Nick Clegg offers to hold your nose for you

The speech by Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg will be covered in tomorrow's Scotsman, but its message was pretty blunt and not exactly expected.

He wants to have the chance to hold the balance of power so his pitch has got to be that only a hung parliament can deliver change if he does.

But these lines are of particular interest:

"I want to warn you about something that is coming in the next few weeks.
"We are going to hear a nonsensical claim from the two old parties designed to scare people into voting against their best interests.
"The Conservatives will say: vote Lib Dem… get Brown.
"Labour will say: vote Lib Dem… get Cameron.
"Don’t believe it for a second. They are wrong."

He added later:

"Some people are thinking of holding their noses and voting for Brown just to keep out the Conservatives. I say to you: don’t do it.
"Some people are thinking of holding their noses and voting for Cameron just to get rid of Labour. Don’t do it.
"You have a once in a generation opportunity for real change."

The problem with this message is that if he holds the balance of power we will still get either Gordon Brown or David Cameron as Prime Minister, we will not get Nick Clegg bar an extraordinary shift in political opinion in the UK.

So in reality what he is saying is let me make the choice for you. In his words he is offering to be the one who holds the nose.

David Maddox: Was the Labour Party trying to tell Gordon Brown something?

M People's Moving on Up sounds pretty uplifting when you're a party staring defeat in the face, but on closer inspection it is an odd choice of song to play Gordon Brown off the stage with, perhaps in more ways then one.
Read for yourself:

You've done me wrong, your time is up
You took a sip (just a sip) from the devils cup.
You broke my heart, there's no way back.
Move right outta here baby.
Go and pack your bags.
Just who do you think you are?
Stop acting like some kind of star.
Just who do you think you are?
Take it like a man baby if that's what you are.

[chorus]
'Cos I'm moving on up.
You're moving on out.
Movin' on up.
Nothing can stop me.
Moving on up.
You're moving on out.
Time to break free.
Nothing can stop me,
Yeah.

They brag a man has walked in space,
but you can't even find my place.
Mmm there ain't nothing (not a thing) you can do
'cos I've had enough of me baby being part of you.

Just who do you think you are?
This time you've gone too far.
Just who do you think you are?
Take it like a man baby if that's what you are.

[chorus]

Gerri Peev: Cable tangled

The storm clouds have gathered over Bournemouth. Overnight, a whale stranded itself on the beach. Perhaps it was an omen of the disastrous day that lay ahead. First up, Vince Cable was ambushed in a "shadow cabinet" meeting of the Lib Dems over his mansion tax policy. Cable is a clever man who has a good run in the press and with the wider public. There are even some predictions that his mansion tax will go down well with voters. It could even be pitched to those on the right as being preferable to taxing income, which is the product of hard work. But the normally careful Cable was left tangled by not sorting the detail of the policy. He seems too affable a man to have let the stardust go to his head, but colleagues were left raging that he had not consulted them over such a fundamental policy change.

Next up, was the press briefing with Clegg's chief of staff, Danny Alexander, who provided the press with a third statement on what the Lib Dems thought should happen to the Attorney General Baroness Scotland, who has been fined for hiring an illegal immigrant as her cleaner. While Chris Huhne took to the airwaves to say she should be sacked, Clegg said she should stay. Meanwhile Alexander suggested she consider her position. During the briefing, a Blackberry alert came through with the message that Clegg had said she should perhaps consider her position. By the end of the day a statement came through saying that her position "looked untenable".

Then came the onstage swipes at Clegg's leadership from his own frontbenchers: pensions spokesman Steve Webb said the party had had enough despair for a week, while Dr Evan Harris, the spokesman on science, suggested that Clegg had some way to go before becoming a great leader.

And then Clegg was bounced into firming up his opposition to a referendum in a BBC Scotland interview, after The Scotsman's story this morning. Tavish Scott had claimed that perhaps colleagues who suggested the policy would be reversed had ingested too many pina coladas. For the record, this correspondent was not sharing cocktails with her sources at the time of acquiring the story. Perhaps Scott was just worried he was on the rocks?

To cap the day off, journos were given a few extracts from Clegg's speech...There is a killer line in it which voters must listen out for tomorrow. The old addage that any publicity is good publicity is truly being stretched for the Lib Dems this week. It almost stirs sympathy for them.

David Maddox: Lib Dem conference - finding a speaker

This Scottish Liberal Democrat conference was billed in the run-up by spin doctors and party leaders as the great thinktank on how to get Scotland and the UK out of the recession.
I've just been sitting in their most high profile debate on the issue - An Economic Recovery Package for Scotland.
You might think that given the billing it would have been difficult to get on the stage to speak. But no. It seems though from the introductions of two speakers - election candidate Fred Macintosh, who ticked the wrong box and and ended up having to oppose an amendment he supports, and Edinburgh City Council leader Jenny Dawe - that the chairwoman of the debate Siobhan Mathers was standing at the door trying to persuade delegates to speak.
Sensitive to this Ms Mathers told delegates: "Don't think that I've been standing at the door trying to find speakers" in a classic case of shutting the door after the horse has bolted.